This is Halloween, Nah-nah-nah

(pic from this here tumblr)

Happy Halloween everybody!

Eat all the darn candy you want! I'll just be sitting here jealous with my left cheek puffed up smothering my face in frozen peas and popping pills since I just got my freaking wisdom teeth pulled, but you know what? That's ok. Cause I got the day off work today. And I get to hand out candy to freaking trick or treaters, assuming we get any, but we BETTER cause I actually bought the candy this time! And I'm excited. (I've never handed out candy to trick or treaters before, tee-hee). And they're all gonna be like, "Your face is kinda lopsided, lady" and "Who's this crazy lady giving us Almond Joys, who even likes Almond Joys?" But man, I'm excited. Excited! 

I'm gonna keep it low key this year, just wear a random combination of black clothes and throw on a witch hat and call it good. I'll post pics if I feel brave enough to show you all my lopsided face. ^_^

Hope you all have fun!

Nostalgic 90's

This may be a lesser known fact about me, but I love 90's music.

It's kinda funny because even though I was alive in the 90's, I wasn't old enough to appreciate the music or culture yet, so why, I often ask myself, do I like 90's music so much?

I guess I should clarfiy, when I say 90's music I'm referring to mostly Brit-pop/rock and Japanese rock:, bands like The Cure, The Cranberries, L'Arc en Ciel, Raphael, Penicillin... etc. As I was getting back into the jrock and visual kei scene a few years ago, I noticed that I didn't really like a lot of the newer bands like I did the 90's bands (with the HUGE exception of Versailles). Even though the 90's bands were plagued by pixelly and blurry video footage, poor audio quality recordings, and oftentimes looked like tacky drag queens with 80's style bangs, I just loved the melodic, reverby and dream-like sound of their music.

And the other day as I was the listening to the Cure, I realized that it's not just something specific to Jrock, but that all the 90's rock bands I like have a similar sound. And I can't help but wonder, do you think the 90's will ever be a "thing"? Like right now some 80's trends are coming back, but will we ever see the 90's come back? Or more specifically, the part of the 90's that I loved?

Just some musings on a Thursday morning.

h. Naoto Grand Opening

So I went to the h. Naoto store's grand opening event last weekend in San Francisco. They were having a free gallery exhibit showcasing costumes that h. Naoto had designed for famous Japanese musicians (including Gackt, Hakuei, and X Japan!). At first I wasn't sure if I should go, or how much I would enjoy it - it was just costumes, and not the actual musicians themselves, so would it really be that interesting? But then I made myself imagine, "Would I be excited to see one of Mana's costumes in real life, even if it was just the costume and not Mana himself?" And then I realized I'd be all over that, so that sealed the deal for me. XD;

And I'm so glad I went!

Naturally, you couldn't take pictures of anything inside, but they had these wreaths outside with notes from various celebrities, congratulating h. Naoto for opening his first store in America, which I eagerly took pictures of.

Among them were wreaths from Hyde (L'Arc en Ciel), Gackt, Yoshiki and Sugizo (X Japan), and Amy Lee (Evanescence).

The gallery was quite small, but it was not a disappointment. It was upstars from the boutique, and in a dimly lit room with a projector playing a video of models striking various poses and walking around. The costumes lined two of the walls.

(Hakuei from Penicillin, wearing h. Naoto)

They had a cape that Hakuei from Penicillin had worn for a photoshoot, it was modeled after Dracula and had nails nailed through the collar that were sticking out, and made me think of nails in a coffin. A girl that looked at it and walked by made the comment, "No hugs for him!"

They had 3 outfits that Gackt had worn: that funky white one from a photoshoot where he looks like he's wearing a schoolgirl skirt, a samurai-esque one, and the vampire-like trenchcoat he wore for the Diabolos tour. The schoolgirl outfit actually had pants under the skirt, we realized, but you couldn't tell from the photoshoot because he was kneeling down. Well, I'm glad we have that cleared up now, right?

The samurai one was very Gackt, it fit his personality and strong interest in samurai and was a samurai-punk style, but I wasn't particularly interested in it.

(Gackt, wearing h. Naoto for his Diabolos Tour)

But the Diabolos tour outfit... was... AMAZING. It was a fitted trenchcoat with a hood that was oddly wrinked/scrunched, and same with the collar. The description panel next to it (which were all written in something between English and Engrish, by the way) said the piece was trying to imitate the skin of a vampire, going for an ancient, weathered look. It was amaaaazing! And tiiiiny! I could have fit into it! I was surprised. But that was my favorite, by far.

Sugizo's outfit had these ruffles going down the front, and Yoshiki's shirt was a super tight and stretchy long sleeve white shirt that the description said was made specifically to not impede his piano playing. XD; Yoshiki's shirt was the tiniest of them all.

We looked at the clothes in the boutique for a little bit after the gallery, but I didn't get a chance to try anything on because we had to meet up with my sister's date. Probably a good thing, because I probably would have bought something that would have been bad because I would be poor and we all know I'm saving up my money for Moitie, right? ^_~

But it was so much fun! I probably helped cause I had my sister there because she has experience with clothing design and runway fashion and was able to give some good insights on the costume designs, and also I had fun trying on a skirt at Baby and talking to the salesclerk for ages XD; it was fun! I feel like sometimes I just need to go to these kinds of things, to connect my obsession with Japanese alternative culture with my own real life. With it all being so far away and my not having many friends that are into it as well, sometimes I just need to know it's real.

I remember back in the day buying the Gothic Lolita Bible magazines and flipping through them with my friends, and seeing the h. Naoto dresses, and now it's come full circle and they've opened a store here, and I went to the grand opening - it's exciting.

Well, that's my review!

Sorry if I've thrown out a lot of Gothic Lolita brandnames/terminology for ya! I love you all! <3

Art

I am obsessed with this dress.

It's from the music video for the song "Petal" by the Japanese band Art Cube. That's their singer Z who's wearing it.

This picture is a screencap I took from the video - it captures the essence of the word "art" to me.

It inspires me.

I spend a lot of my afternoons perusing Youtube for things to inspire me - inspire me to do what? I don't even know. I know, it's sad - as much as I'd like to think I'm not one of those people that lives to be entertained, I kind of am sometimes ^_^* I'm trying to get better, though, really!

Recently I've been thinking about how my favorite anime shows exhibit principles of the gospel.

I'll probably write another post on that later, though, for now it's goodnight!

Minor Details

When we left our home in Utah and consequently the world we knew during our years of college, we looked optimistically toward our futures: Matt was going to get a job teaching by the next

school year, and I was going to get a full-time job doing something cool wherever he ended up getting a job. That was the plan.

Surprisingly, everything has pretty much gone according to plan, but it was the minor details that we had not anticipated.

We didn't know how miserable we would be for the next 8 months, trying to find jobs, questioning the value of our degrees, and having nothing more than minimum wage positions.

We didn't know that the one job Matt did get I would not be excited about to the point that the main reason I agreed for him to take it and for us to move out there was because I didn't think we would have any other opportunities.

But we also didn't know how blessed we would be after that 8 month trial of our patience.

Matt's job is in Vallejo. I had lived near Vallejo when I was young, so I knew all too well the reputation it had - ghetto. I was not excited to move there. We agreed that even though he would work in Vallejo, we wouldn't want to live there. So, I decided on a whim to see how close Martinez was to Vallejo.

Martinez was a city I had seen from the train when I would take the train to Sacramento when Matt and I were dating. I had never seen that city or that part of the bay before, and I immediately fell in love with it. There was water everywhere, but it was peaceful and had a small town feel, and I decided that it would be neat to live there when I grew up.

Turns out, Martinez is quite close to Vallejo, but across a toll bridge, so I looked to see what town was on the other side of the bridge - Benicia. I had never been to Benicia before, nor did I know anything about it, except I remembered that when I was little my mom would always talk about the Benicia Bridge. I found out, however, that Benicia was actually a really safe town, even though it was right next to Vallejo, and also affordable since it was 2 toll bridges away from San Francisco. So I looked up a bunch of craigslist ads, and called Matt a bunch of times when he was out there looking, and bam, now we live here.

It's an awesome place, and seriously, everyone we've met here has been nice.

The people at church have been super supportive, they've helped us move, invited us over for dinner, and even helped get me a job 2 weeks after we moved there - I am now working as a receptionist at a dental office! Matt got his friend a job at the school he's teaching at, we live within an hour and a half of both our families, and 45 minutes away from San Francisco. Not to mention, the nice Bay Area weather helps us stay cool during the summer when we don't have A/C.

And THIS is something I remember seeing from the train - I called it a "rusty trailer on a stick" because I had no idea what it was (still don't, actually).

But it made me think, was the town I fell in love with really Martinez, or was it Benicia?

Life has been really good to us recently, and we are so blessed. Regardless of what ends up happening in the future, I've decided I'm going to make the most out of my experience here. I'm going to keep writing my story, keep developing who I am, take in the things that Benicia can teach me and make them a part of myself.

This is a view that captures what "home" is to me right now.

Here's to a new chapter in my story!

Can a metalhead have a successful career?

I remember in middle school and high school having writing assignments, poems, I think they were, that consisted of sentences of the following structure: "Just because I'm _____ doesn't mean _____." I never really took it that seriously at the time, but I found myself recently thinking something of the "I'm a _____, I can't _____" fashion: "I'm a metalhead, I can't possibly have a successful career."
Being a part of the scene, I know just as well as anyone that metalheads come in all shapes and sizes, with all sorts of different personalities, views, and interests. But for some reason when it came time for job interviews and people asking me what my interests and hobbies were, I hesitated to mention anything related to metal, even though some of my greatest and most ambitious accomplishments have been related to metal. I was scared that, after finding out that this quiet and sweet looking girl listened to metal they would freak out, thinking that there was a different me under the surface that I was hiding. And in addition, I am fully aware of the stereotype that metalheads either work at bars or record stores and aren't good for much else. So usually I end up just avoiding the subject altogether, and end up looking like a boring personalityless person. But that's not the impression I want to leave, so I can't help but wonder, is it possible for a metalhead to overcome those stereotypes and have a successful career?
After a long conversation with Matt he told me that it is our job to break that stereotype and that I shouldn't feel limited in what kind of job I can get just because I listen to a certain type of music. And he's right, you know? It's just a different style of music that isn't very popular, but in the end all it says about me is what my taste in music is, really. But I think it'll still be a while before I stop hesitating to bring up the subject of my liking metal around people I'm trying to impress..
Thoughts?

Happy Fourth

Hope you all had a great 4th of July!
I was quite groggy and cranky from the heat, but the food was great and we had a great view of the fireworks from Matt's parents house. I wore my mom's wrap skirt that I snagged from her closet the day before, and I felt very summery and stylish.
I realized while watching fireworks that there's nothing quite like Provo on the 4th, the parade, people camping out on the street, roaming around, playing music into all hours of the night, you know. Good times! I miss it, hopefully we can be back for that again, someday.
But now it's time to drag myself out of bed after the long weekend and get back to normal life (whatever that is) and try to be productive (or just play videogames) and try to identify where the hands of fate are trying to lead me right now.
Hope you are all handling the heat ok!